Written on 9/5/2016
It’s been a month since I’ve posted to summer squeeze. I know, I know- the amount of phone calls and texts I’ve received asking for an update have shocked me as well. (Thank you)
When I first started summer squeeze my goal was to spend 90 days online dating and see where things got me. My goal was to provide a place where paid advertising was forbidden and real dating tactics in this newfound world of online dating could be.
As I’m reflecting on the last day of summer, the funny thing is I don’t even think that online dating was the solution to finding someone. I think this post is going to be a bit sentimental just because it is the last day of summer and technically the last day of this project, (I know I need to backdate many posts from the multiple dates that I’ve had in the month of August), I really wanted to reflect on what this summer has been for me.
Here’s what I’ve learned about online dating:
- Be yourself. I know it sounds simple and I know it’s difficult, but this is what I realized. Why wouldn’t you want to be yourself when you’re trying to find someone through online dating. If we started to think about online dating and of the dating apps as mediums to meeting new people and only as mediums all of the crazy bullshit tactics of who messages who and when to send a message are completely eliminated. Only because you’re being yourself. I stopped over analyzing about messaging times and frequency and when I did this I actually put less pressure on myself and it worked!
- Tinder works. And it’s not just booty calls. Create your tinder profile and start swiping. If you get weird messages or late-night messages which you’re not comfortable with delete them. You never have to talk to that person. It’s all about your choice and again about the medium. Tinder is huge and continues to grow. It’s growing because it’s working, and people are meeting each other without that negative connotation of a one night stand (it could be a positive connotation if that floats your boat too!). Now, I will let you know that you will get the weird and odd messages but your chances of finding more people are high and frequent.
- Profiles mean a lot. Present yourself as you want to be presented but remember to be yourself. If you’re only, again, using this a medium to meet people and seriously want to meet someone take it seriously and try to put your best foot forward with a good profile. In my opinion, let your best friend create your profile and don’t change it when they hand your phone back to you.
- Listen to Aziz! Put some effort into it. <Sentimental > Online dating is hard and in our generation dating is harder than ever. I’m sure if you have made it here to Summer Squeeze you’ve seen your friends and family members continue to find “their person” which creates a frustration about yourself which then ultimately develops a nasty lack of confidence in yourself. If you’re interested in finding someone, it is logically sound to go and put some effort into it. Like anything from your job to maybe even training for a marathon, it takes effort. This doesn’t mean that once a week you can just swipe left and right and then follow up with messages the next week. If you’re interested in online dating and/or finding someone, you need to do what I did. Listen to your friends and get on these apps. Remove the stereotypes from your head and just do it. Summersqueeze is the reason I put some effort into it. These apps are here to help you find people who have similar interest, it’s making it easier! But dating was never just a right and left swipe, it always included some effort.
- PS: If you need an extra push and want to blog about your dating adventures, contact me, I would be more than happy to help.
<End sentimental post> Point number four has the most meaning to it. When I first started this blog I was so afraid of telling people who I was and why I was writing this blog. I’m not done dating and I will continue to update Summersqueeze but what this blog has done has taught me that it’s OK to be a little bit vulnerable and get on these apps. They do work and you do meet wonderful people of all types of backgrounds. Isn’t that what life is supposed to be about?
Now onto the good stuff- a date story!
About two weeks ago two of my wonderful friends from New Jersey came down for a weekend. These friends are super fun and full of energy and life. It was going to be a weekend of nonstop fun and friendship. And it was…
I’ll leave all of the different places and adventures we went to for another post. On this very rainy Saturday we ended up at a local brewery here in town called Hops and Grain. Lucky for everyone in the brewery, it was raining cats and dogs so we spent the majority of our time at this brewery. (Anyone who was there and saw us running around doing the chicken dance because we lost in a game of kings, you are welcome for that entertainment) I’m not so sure the brewery was happy about it but we had a great time. After the rain, we ended up at a local bar called the Liberty. My friend Erin bumped into a few friends that she knew, one who we will call Nick.
I’m sure you can assume by now that Nick and I hit it off right away. It definitely helped that I spent most of my time at the brewery, hence a slight buzz, which helped with my conversation starters with Nick.
That night was an extraordinary one, filled with multiple bars and lots of fun. We stopped at the Whitehorse inn, where Nick and I actually two-stepped. To this day both of us are unsure of how great to step routine we did.
I’m going to leave the details of the past two weeks with Nick to another post but I couldn’t help but share the irony of tonight’s date. Nick and I have been seeing each other for only two weeks. We hit it off on Saturday and continued to meet throughout the next two weeks. We found we had many common interests and our conversations were interesting and exciting. Nick asked me to dinner on the last day of the three day weekend. He made reservations at Odd Duck, a very nice tapas restaurant which I highly recommend. After dinner, we had drinks at Highball where he purposely parked on the sixth floor of a very open parking garage. After cocktails and a ride on the elevator, we walked out to the top level of the garage to a gorgeous skyline of Austin.
I hope you could see some of the irony to ending up with a pretty nice guy watching the beautiful Austin skyline on the final day of summer. It was a GREAT date and I couldn’t have been happier. It made me reflect on this summer and Summersqueeze and what it’s done for me as a person.
Thanks to my friends who pushed me to start this. I owe you guys.
As for the end of the date?
It was great. He’s great and we’re still dating. (I know!) Stay tuned for more as we jump into Fall.
Pumpkin spice anyone?